Just let her jump

"Just let her jump."

We were strolling through the gardens of the Chateau de Chantilly and it was our last day in France. My husband said those words after I had repeatedly voiced my concern over the state of my two-year-old daughter's leggings and dress as mud and cold water splashed above her rubber boots. There seem to be a puddle on the garden path every five feet. I stared in frustration as she let out a giggle and jumped both feet first into the next one. I sighed, staring past her towards the picturesque scene behind us. A 14th century home of a French noble family; stone walls, graceful architecture and elegant gates. It was too beautiful to be irritated, yet there I was, wrinkles across my forehead and my lips crooked into a frown as Isabelle splashed into yet another puddle. 

I feel like I spend half my time as a mother cleaning up spills and accidents and rubbing stains out of clothes. Its even worse when you are on a three week trip to Europe with two toddlers. In my defense I was trying to avoid as much mess as possible. But I somehow failed to see the green grass and blue sky and most of all the wonder in my daughter's eyes. She wasn't worried about her clothes or cold water or my feelings on the matter. All she knew was she was free. No one was strapping her into a carseat or holding tightly to her hand or telling her to sit still. She was simply being a child, in all the the glory and wonder of it all. 

As we meandered deeper through the gardens, leaving the chateau behind, I was reminded quite vividly how easily it is to forget beauty amidst worry. I was letting my importance on appearance and comfort take over the deeper meanings of life. We had just spent an entire hour touring one of the most beautiful, historic buildings I've ever visited and within minutes of walking out the exit doors I was worried about minor inconveniences. I forgot the pleasure of my child's heart and focused on the selfishness of my own. Too many times I fixate on everything out of place instead of seeing the depth of richness right below the surface of chaos. As I passed the broken bridges and overgrown statues amongst the garden paths, remnants of the french past, I could hear Isabelle's laughter echoing the trees. She was surrounded by beauty and that was all she saw. Would that I had eyes to see that more often. Would that we all. 

And so she kept jumping, from puddle to puddle, trekking through the mud, her curls askew and her cheeks ruddy red. 

Freedom!!!!

Two things God has me focused on: Joan or Arc & Nehemiah

I love of Joan of Arc, she inspires me. What would this modern world do if someone of her character and vision appeared demanding justice? She was only a peasant, unlearned, and even timid, how did she become general? I know the story, but still it's a bit mystifying.

We could use some more Joan of Arcs.

What is it like to rarely question whether or not God is speaking to you? Joan didn't, she always knew beforehand what would happen, trusted completely in God, and walked calmly through the troubles around...even to her death. Talk about having faith in God's will!
This has me searching my own heart right now, wishing I had such bold courage, and causing great turmoil in my sleep. Literally for two nights after I watched some clips from the 1999 Joan of Arc film, I could not sleep. Something deep was stirred in my spirit. It weirded me out at first. I was both miserable and happy all at once.

We need some more Joan of Arcs.

I believe God is stirring it up, as we enter into these days of spiritual upheaval and battle. He wants Joan of Arcs, young people, to step out and be generals. Someone has got to do, 'cause without it our world hurtling at a rapid pace toward complete destruction.

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Along with all this, I have also been reading feverishly through the book of Nehemiah. I'm finding how very important it is to confess the sins of our fathers, and to be prepared for battle, even as we build. I will perhaps go deeper into this, because I know I will be stuck in this book for a while, but for now I just wanted to post the scriptures that are jumping out on the page at me. In fact I've written them out and stapled them to the walls of my bedroom.

"Let Your ear now, be attentive and Your eyes open to hear the prayer of Your servant, which I am praying for You now, day and night on behalf of the sons of Israel, Your servants, confessing the sing of the sons of Israel which we have sinned against You; I and my father's house have sinned.
"We have acted very corruptly against You and have not kept the commandments, nor the statutes, nor the ordinances which You commanded Your servant Moses.
Remember the world which You commanded Your servant Moses saying," If you are unfaithful I will scatter you among the peoples but if you return to Me and keep My commandments and do them though those of you who have been scattered were in the most remote part of the heavens, I will gather them from there and will bring them to the place where I have chosen to cause My name to dwell.
They are Your servants and Your people whom You redeemed by Your great power and by Your strong hand. O Lord, I beseech You, may Your ear be attentive to the prayer of Your servant and the prayers of Your servants who delight to revere Your name..."
Nehemiah 1:6-11

And I found this second verse very interesting:

"From that day on, half of my servants carried on the work while half of them held spears, the shields, the bows and the breastplates; and the captains were behind the whole house of Judah. Those who were rebuilding the wall and those who carried burdens took their load with one hand doing the work and the other holding a weapon."
Nehemiah 4:16-17